Now I'm sure you're extremely curious as to how us college students do it. Therefore let me tell you how it works, and hopefully you might heed to my words and survive.
1. College v. High School
- Attendance- So College classes don't take roll... Pretty awesome right? Yes actually, very wonderful. So I skip classes whenever I feel like it? False. There isn't really a way to make up work you miss, or material learned... So go to class! No matter what!
- Homework- If you're complaining about homework in High School... Its because you need to stop procrastinating. If College had High School Homework it would be called UVU. (sorry mean joke) Now moving on... Do your homework now, and get ready for the bajillion times more work college requires.
- Drama? So most people say they can't wait to escape High School drama... Well the truth is, High School Drama is nothing. In College all the girls want to get married, and won't date freshman. So it basically multiplies all the drama times bajillion.
2. Food
Do you like food? If you do I recommend you figure out a schedule of meals you can make... That aren't too time consuming... Because there isn't a lot of time in these college days xP
So basically figure out what you want to eat during college. btw Top Ramen every day is a bad idea.
Also take advantage of free food. Its very wonderful getting free food. So go if you can :)
3. Social Life
Just so you know you might want to think about getting rid of 50% of your social life... Okay maybe all of it but one weekend night... And save some time for tunnel singing (If you plan on going to BYU) So basically plan on having no life during the week. Because if you try hanging out on the weekends you don't do your homework. Which all results in you failing your classes... And Failing your classes... Well we all know why thats bad :)
So now if you feel like read my paper-
Payden Jolley
Writing 150-Section 70
Emily Belanger
09/27/2011
The Perfect Fit
My roommate, he’s kind of like those shoes that look great in your closet, but when you put them on they just aren’t very comfortable. Being around him is impossible to describe, as if tasting a sweet and sour candy, as if chewing on a piece of gum that lost its flavor 30 minutes ago, you hate it, but at the same time you enjoy it. Don’t you? Now as I sit here typing this I’m hoping that my roommate doesn’t decide to propel his fist through my face. But I’m just as grateful for the water bottle he just handed me, my throat is so dry! As the roller-coaster of our relationship screams through the year, I hope we can both learn something from our differences. Oh, and of course our similarities.
My roommate is like a mosquito, you don’t really realize he is there, until there’s the irritating rash of what he's left behind. There he is just the regular morning, eating a bowl of cereal. I grab my cereal box off the top of the fridge, the single serving that remained last night is now in his bowl, into his spoon, and his throat. How one person could be so inconsiderate, as to not ask before taking something, is beyond me. Haven’t you ever had a friend that just drives you to the point of insanity? Like the one kid who asks to have a sip of your smoothie and he drinks the whole entire thing. Well, he’s like that, my roommate, he doesn’t seem to understand that whats mine is mine, and whats his is his. Goodness gracious, do I ever steal his stuff? Heavens no!
Okay I’ll admit it, I couldn’t ask for a better roommate, the truth is, he isn’t as bad as I make him out to be. He really is a great guy. He cares a lot about people, and would never intentionally hurt someone. He is getting dates all the time, and I don’t even know how he does it, and I sure don’t mind it. There are so many luxurious ladies around him that I usually get the leftovers. So that is definitely a bonus, and I love him for it. He may always bring me his last picks. But who cares? He draws in the best of girls, the fabulous funny ones, the creative cute ones, and the romantic righteous ones. I can never go wrong relying on him to set me up! Heck, even if its a blind date!
You know those people that beg for attention? They just can’t get enough of it? Every moment of ever day they want to have the spotlight. And my roommate would be one of those people. Can you imagine having him always shouting and yelling at people to get them to glance over? Its like I’m babysitting a rowdy 12 year old, one that wont shut his mouth. Sometimes I have to put in ear plugs when I study because he gets so loud; and the only time I should have to do that, is when the Lawn Mower passes by my window. My roommate is not a lawn mower!
Have you ever been to a 5-star restaurant? If you haven’t don’t bother. Just come on over to my place! I know a 6 star chef awaiting to cook the dinner of your dreams! My roommate ought to be cooking dinner every single night! The guy is a master chef, the moment my lips touched his precious and treasured creme brûlée I thought I had died and gone to heaven. He can make even the pickiest of people’s tastebuds water. Just imagine, the one who gets to eat all of this food: the cookies, roast, potatoes, and soup; so much delicious food from this man, all for me.
Some girls flock to certain men more then others. Usually because they have shirt breaching muscles, a quiet confidence with a splash of funny, or intelligence to connect with all who surround them. The time he took the girl to Mount Timpanogos for the sunrise, I knew it was over. That sums up my roommate pretty well. The girl getter, the bandit of babes. He always steals the girls I want most, and it just isn’t fair.
The kids a genius! But works to much out of school; fine by me, for I get a shot with the ladies. Haven’t you ever struggled to understand math, science, or any subject for that matter? I have. But no more will I worry. I’ve got a free, personal, number crunching, scientifically mind blowing roommate. No way I’m going to fail a class with this Einstein by my side. You might as well blow E=MC2 out of the equation, for he’s about to defy gravity.
What a geek. My roommate may not have the giant glasses and the Steve Urkel pants, but he sure acts like it. Does he think his star trek lego ship and mini figures will do him any good? I think not! It’s all a game to him, soaring swiftly like a star ship, jabbing a saber just like a Jedi. It is so silly. He’s almost killed me with that light saber of his, he really needs to read the safety warning, “CAUTION DO NOT poke or jab with Light saber. Sections are made to stick together in the extended position and will not easily collapse if jabbed into an object, individual, or animal.” I’ve tried showing him, let’s just say I was not so joyfully jabbed.
Should I be counting my blessings? After all It could be worse. I have such an awesome friend that I get to live with. He can, after all make me dinner to perplex my mind. He can help me differentiate what I couldn’t before. This world is full of things we can be grateful for. There is always that piece of life that we can all love so dearly. Why can’t I just find that in my roommate? Some people are torn apart by their differences, but I can pull me and my roommate together. Don’t you ever feel that way? I recognize that I do! I have so much to be grateful for.
How come I get the senseless roommate who has no common courtesy? Why don’t other people have the dumb old geezer who can’t get a dime? He can’t even fathom the simplistic act of buying his own toilet paper! Can’t he do anything for himself! Why can’t I have anything like he’s got it? He can’t handle a job interview, he’s just to cocky, crammed, and complicated. Poor guy just doesn’t stand a sliver of a chance.
Well, maybe he’s got a shot? Does he? I think I get it now! The point of all of this. Those places in life which he struggles I can help build him higher. I can help him learn that he can’t have everything he wants, and he can’t just take my food. He can teach me his ways with the lovely ladies and I can get those girl melting muscles. By working side by side with him, he can help me get a 4.0 while I’ll help him learn to go grocery shop for his own fancy food, and not so charmin’ toilet paper, I can teach him how to settle down his horrific hormonal self and not be such a player. We’re going to become best friends; maybe my roommate is, after all, a perfect fit.
Love,
Pay
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